Coven Member Collection

I recently received an email on one of my witchy yahoogroups. It was about a Pagan Meet and included these words: Meet new people and check out the members of my Coven!

Oh my goodness! If my high priest/ess had sent an email like this inviting people to come meet new people and “check me out” I would leave in a heartbeat. People are not for display, nor are members of a coven collectable. The point isn’t to get as many people as you can, or to grow your number. A coven is a spiritual family, and whether you have a group of 3 or 13, the point is to become close-knit like a common family. “Our numbers are growing” is another phrase I have seen from people who are creating new covens. It’s not a war- you aren’t building an army. Sure, it’s nice to have more like-minded people around, but I bet that these new leaders of groups will find out very quickly that more does not always equal better.

This was one of the issues with the first covens I participated in. We had 13 or so people, but not all of them were on the same page. Some wanted a teaching group, some wanted it to be a working group, some had Norse leanings, others wanted to honor deities of other cultures. Expectations were not laid out, the group cohesiveness was missing, and the leader accepted anyone who wanted to join. Which meant we had a few people with some sort of traditional training, and others who thought that they could fly. The group fell apart in less than a year. If one focuses on quantity, rather than quality- then this will be the eventual outcome. People will be unhappy, and leave. A coven is also not about the high priestess. A coven is about the group- the synergy that is created when all are of one hive mind. If a high priestess is on a power trip, then she won’t have members for long. Unless she likes the simpering sycophant. But sycophants do not make the best energy work partners.

I don’t know. This email made me stop and think. As I don’t really know anyone on the list, and don’t want to get a reputation of a troublemaker I’ll keep my mouth shut. When really I’d like to gently let the writer know that his/her coven members might not appreciate being objectified. But I’m pretty sure, I’d get that overly-diplomatic, holier than thou reputation that I wrote about in my last blog. I might reach out to this person and touch base with them, as I’d like to get a community ritual together. And it’s completely possible that the writer misspoke. If this is so, I’m glad s/he did so that I’d be inspired to share my feelings on groupweaving on my blog.